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After every flight, Quantas pilots fill out a form, called a “gripe sheet,” which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The Mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.

Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by
Quantas’ Pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by> maintenance engineers. By the way, Quantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident. … Enjoy!

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That’s what they’re for.

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you’re right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Targt radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

And the best one for last……………..
P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget

I saw this movie last night - Robots. I heard it got great reviews for kids and adults and Megan wanted to see a movie so off we went. The reviews were right on the money. A great cast - upbeat plot and pace of a movie (I can’t stand something that drags on unless its Epic). Funny and RObin Williams is his normal greatness. Go see it - pity da fool who don’t!

Next up - I finally upgraded my router. I was runnin a DLink 514 - a cheap sale on Tigerdirect - and I got exactly what was paid for. Firmware upgrades didn’t do a thing and bandwidth degredation reigned. Best Buy was running a deal on the Linksys WRT54G 2.2 . Wireless G 2.4 GHz and backed by a great company Cisco Systems. What the heck - heres a picture.

And last but not least - the trip went good. I was in Key West no more than 24 hours but thats ok. I’ll live there one day if Charleston doesn’t work out ;). As for my grandfather - well - for those of you that pray - Pray.

Memaws doin that Teacher/Glasses thing.

I wish it were a pleasure voyage - but tomorrow at 06:10 I take flight to Miami, FL thru Atlanta to meet my grandparents and drive them home. My grandfather is dying of congestive heart failure, etc and the family has called on me to come drive their 300 foot camping world home. They’ve done lots for me, so it’s the least I can do for them. It’s gonna be a longgg weekend though.

Thanks to those who have shown support and pray there’s no motha-fuckin foriegn patriots with Stinger Missles standing around any airfields I go near.

-Matt